Misisng the point

My mom SO gets on my nerves

Atrios posted this up about the Helaine Olen piece in the Times. A lot of blather, and many points missed.

Slimed by the Times

I'll have more later on why yesterday's wanker was deserving of such a high honor 'cause I think a lot of people don't quite get it.

Until then, here's more commentary on the subject:

Helaine Olen

Helaine Olen

Helaine Olen



Helaine Olen

Helaine Olen

Helaine Olen

Helaine Olen

It's all how Helaine Olen is a bad person, how she unfairly used the Times to go after the nanny.

And I agree. It is despicable to use the Times to go after a former employee.

But here's the deal, if she had kept the blog to herself, there would have been no story. The blogger opened herself up to this. She has every right to post on her life. But it is so obvious that Olen was a jealous, envious woman that the nanny's postings were going to lead to trouble. And the incidents of boozing and sex were highlighted to cast the blogger in the worst possible light. But, exactly what do you expect someone who fires you to do? Well, puts her husband up to fire you. If someone had told me of this while it was going on, here's what I would have said: pull down the blog, post anonymously, and don't write about your current employer. Protect yourself And that's tjhe key here, protect yourself. No matter how nice your boss is, it is still your boss.

The last thing this woman wanted is her husband reading any of this, and she decided to get rid of the competition before he caught on

But what none of these comments deals with is the simple fact that the central mistake was that the blogger let the employer into her life. Someone who could ruin her reputation. My bet is that she never really understood her position in that family. She was a servant. Sure, they treated her nice, but servants arent supposed to have a life. Once she let her employer into that life, as her employer, she was inviting judgment. My bet is that the blogger assumed they were social equals and the employer certainly did not. The blogger, with her education and ability to fit into her employer's social circle, assumed a friendship which obviously did not exist.

This is hardly a new story. Women seem to make this mistake a lot in work, more than men. They become friendly with the boss, go shopping, hang out and then are shocked when they get betrayed. by their "friend". And having logged four years at NetSlaves, this was the most important aspect of the story. That's the point to me. She trusted her boss when that trust was a complete mistake. I can't blame a 25 year old woman for not realizing that, but it's pretty sad she had to find out in the Times, exactly the character of her former boss.

But the blogger, no matter how she discussed what happened at work, no matter how she put it, would have been fired by far less vindictive people. Which is why people need to keep their private life private. It's not about freedom of speech or a "patriarchal society" but common fucking sense.

But I am pleased that so many people are screaming about Olen's own lack of judgment.

The blogger showed miserable judgment in showing her blog to her employer.

But Olen showed even worse judgment in using that blog and her jealousy to misrepresent and judge this woman in the Times. And the reaction should make that clear.

posted by Steve @ 10:33:00 AM