The Barbara Bush Interview
The Barbara Bush Interview
Woman's Day recently did an interview with Former First Lady Barbara Bush. This unedited transcript was e-mailed to me last night. It gives a rather different picture of Mrs. Bush than what was seen in the media. Of course, this won't be seen in the SCLM version, but I decided to share.
Woman's Day: Mrs. Bush, thank you for letting us in your home (Kennebunkport, ME).
Barbara Bush: You betcha. Let's talk about that lying fuck Dick Clarke. You know Washington is filled with little faggots like that. My George certainly cared about that Bin Laden fellow. Why his uncle told George 41 that Osama always had a hair up his ass with that Koran business. When you have a bitter little attention queen like Dick Clarke lying about my George and that sweet little Condi, I'm shocked that so many people would believe him.
WD: You think Dick Clarke is lying?
BB: Of course. My George isn't stupid. Why he's President, like a Bush man should be, he has the right breeding. Of course he knows the scion of Saudi Arabia's second richest family is a loon. If we didn't know the Bin Laden's, how could they leave the country on 9/11? Don't be silly.
WD: So, you say your son was on top of the Al Qaeda threat?
BB: Well, that Xanax-taking bitch Laura and her slattern kids might have been a distraction. George does take that family thing a bit seriously. I mean, we've already paid for two abortions and bail for one of them. Yeesh, not that Jeb is any better. But he has an excuse, his wife is one of those brown ones. Even if they don't have public sex or become a coke addict, keeping them on the straight and narrow is hard. Have you been to LA or Dallas?
One of my great regrets is the wives my boys chose. No winners. At least Doro was smart enough to divorce that loser she married early on.
WD: You don't like them?
BB: Look, I had to bribe that Sharon to keep her mouth shut. So what if Neil got some strange. That's what Bush men do. She didn't have to whine to that dried up hag Kitty Kelley, much less try to write a book. Laura sits down, pops Xanax and smokes all day. What a fucking zombie. Thank God he has that sweet little Condi in his life. She'd be the perfect wife for him. Submissive, attentive. There isn't a week I don't wish he dumped Laura.
WD: What do you think about John Kerry?
BB: That little bitch? How dare he attack my son. He's a coward who will weaken his country.
WD: Didn't Sen. Kerry win a Silver Star in Vietnam? Didn't he win a Bronze Star for saving a man's life under fire?
BB:: Cheap theatrics. Is it my fault his parents couldn't keep him out of Vietnam? We made sure our George was safe, what was wrong with his parents. He went to Yale, for God's sake. What was he doing in Vietnam? Look, just because 3,000 Americans died on my son's watch, how could you trust the Democrats to protect this country. They're always looking to cut deals and run away. Even this so-called hero, Kerry.
WD: But didn't your family have extensive dealings with Saudi officials over the years.
BB: They're our friends. What's wrong with friends from Saudi Arabia? So what if they've made us rich and conflicted with US policy.
WD: How do you spend your days?
BB: Well, I wake up, read the papers, make George 41 get up and golf or something, so he's out of my hair, have Maisie serve me breakfast, and make a pitcher of these lovely orange martinis.
WD: Orange martinis?
BB: Yes, a few slices of orange, a bottle of Tanquerey, some vermouth, and a little Orange Hi-C.
WD: A bottle?
BB: Well, I don't drink the whole thing in a day. But you need a bottle to even things out. Besides, so we go through a case a month, big deal. We're retired and this makes things fun.
WD: You spend your days drunk?
BB: Of course not. That would take two bottles. We're Connecticut WASP's. One bottle of gin is like water. It just puts an edge on.
This is the end of my e-mailed transcript
posted by Steve @ 9:00:00 AM